Training the Mind Is Like Training a Puppy
Have you ever tried to meditate or be mindful, only to feel completely defeated by the constant chatter in your head?
You sit down to focus, and suddenly your brain offers up a never-ending buffet of thoughts:
Did I reply to that email? Why did she say that? What’s for dinner? I really messed that up yesterday. I wonder what’s happening on Instagram…
It can feel frustrating. You might even think: "I can’t do this. My mind just won’t sit still."
But here’s the truth: That’s not a failure. That’s your mind doing exactly what minds do.
Minds are a bit like puppies.
Training the mind is like training a puppy.
If you’ve ever been around a puppy, you know what I mean. A puppy is full of energy and curiosity. It’s constantly sniffing, wandering, jumping, chewing, chasing its tail. The world is full of exciting and unfamiliar smells — like the irresistible scent of biltong wafting through the air.
We don’t expect the puppy to sit still in one place all day long. That’s not what puppies do.
And it’s not what minds do, either.
So What Are We Actually Doing in Mindfulness?
Let’s be clear — the goal of mindfulness is not to have a mind free of thoughts. The goal is to:
Notice the thoughts that arise — the way a puppy might notice the scent of biltong.
Pause before reacting — instead of leaping across the kitchen to snatch it.
Return attention — gently guiding the mind (or the puppy) back to what we were doing.
That’s it.
You are not trying to banish your thoughts, or scold your mind for wandering. You’re just teaching it to stay close, respond, and come back — over and over again.
Changing the Way We Relate to Thoughts
When we practice mindfulness of current thoughts, we’re learning to observe thoughts as thoughts — not facts, not instructions, not truths about who we are.
Painful or anxious thoughts will still show up (just like your puppy will still notice the smell of food), but you don’t have to follow them. You can acknowledge them, and choose your next move.
This shift — from reacting to observing — reduces suffering. It gives us space. It helps us live more freely.
So Be Gentle. With Yourself and Your Mind.
Every time your attention wanders and you bring it back, it’s like calling your puppy back to you.
With patience and consistency, that puppy begins to learn: “Yes, there are interesting smells out there. But I don’t have to chase every single one.”
And neither do you.
By Dr Michelle Beukes-King
