Introduction
IN THIS LESSON
Welcome — I’m so glad you’re here.
If you’ve found yourself turning to food for comfort, stress relief, or emotional escape, this course was designed with you in mind. Emotional eating is not a sign of weakness or lack of willpower — it’s a coping mechanism. And in DBT, we learn that coping strategies are there for a reason, even if they’re no longer working for us the way they once did.
In this course, you’ll learn practical tools from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) that can help you:
Understand your emotional triggers
Pause before acting on an urge
Tolerate distress in healthier ways
Reduce shame and emotional overwhelm
Build a life where food isn’t your only source of comfort
You don’t need a diagnosis to benefit from DBT skills — just a willingness to be curious and open to trying something different. You’ll move through the course at your own pace, learning new concepts, practicing reflections, and applying real-world skills to your eating patterns and emotional habits.
There’s no perfection expected here. Only self-awareness, compassion, and the courage to take one small step at a time.
Let’s begin.
To start, click on each of the boxes below to complete the worksheets to learn a bit more about yourself, your current thoughts around eating and what you do to cope.
Remember to do this without judging yourself, you are doing the best you can at the moment.
Before we get started, let’s take a pause so that you can check in with yourself — gently and honestly.
Understanding Emotional Eating
Purpose: To begin recognizing patterns and triggers in a non-judgmental way, remember, no judgment here — just curiosity.
Complete the worksheet below to help you notice what’s happening before, during, and after emotional eating moments
One of the premises of DBT is that you are doing the best you can, with the skill that you currently have.
So, before we add new skills, let’s take a moment to acknowledge what you’ve already been doing to get through tough moments — even if those strategies aren’t perfect.
Today we are going to start our journey by learning about our WISE mind and how to use we can use it to start changing our relationship to food and emotional eating.
What is your WISE mind?
Our WISE mind is the balance between our emotion mind and our reason mind.
Our emotion mind is governed by our emotions- sometimes rational and at times irrational. Our reason mind is governed by our intellect and rules. This can be good but if we don’t balance it with our emotion mind, we can end up being too rigid.
Why and When should we use our WISE mind?
Sometimes we let our Emotion mind control our decisions, this could sound like, “I am so too tired to cook a healthy meal” or “I had a rough day, the only thing that will make me feel better is ice cream and Netflix.”
Our Rational or Reason Mind is all about logic. It is governed by rules e.g., “I am either on a diet, or off a diet” or “If I eat this cookie I may as well it the whole box and start my diet again tomorrow.”
When we are trying to find a balance regarding our views about food and eating we often need to find our WISE mind to proceed both mindfully and in a way that allows us to make the right decision. Without it we could follow our Emotion mind and give in and eat all the cookies instead of just one.
Or we end up eating one cookie and then Reason mind jumps in and tells us that since we broke the rule i.e., no eating cookies, we are no longer on our diet and should just throw the towel in and finish off the entire box.
Asking our Wise Mind what to do is important because it is the part of you that knows what the right thing to do is. It is often a balance between our Emotion Mind and our Reason Mind.
“I had a really rough day and want to eat all the ice cream, but I know I will feel like a failure if I do. I don’t need to eat the entire tub though, so I am going to allow myself two scoops. This isn’t about me being on a diet or off a diet, it is about me making healthy choices.”
Understanding Wise Mind
Finding the Inner Wisdom That Lives Within You
Let’s explore these concepts in more detail so that you can practice finding your Wise Mind over the next week.
One of the core ideas in DBT is that each person has an inner wisdom — a calm, grounded place where decisions come from clarity, not chaos. We call this Wise Mind.
Wise Mind is not about being perfect. It’s about being centered. It’s the part of you that knows what’s true, what really matters, and what action is needed — even when life is painful.
So What Is Wise Mind, Exactly?
Wise Mind is the balance between Reasonable Mind and Emotion Mind. It’s not about choosing one or the other — it’s about integrating both.
Reasonable Mind
This is the part of your mind that thinks logically and rationally.
It:
Plans
Analyzes
Focuses on facts and evidence
Solves problems based on logic
When you’re only in Reasonable Mind, emotions and values feel irrelevant.
“What’s the most efficient option?”
“What does the data say?”
This is useful for tasks — but not always for relationships, identity, or self-care.
Emotion Mind
This is the part of your mind that is ruled by feelings.
It:
Reacts from mood and impulse
Is driven by fear, anger, sadness, shame, or even excitement
Often loses sight of long-term consequences
There’s a difference between feeling strong emotions and being in Emotion Mind.
Emotion Mind takes over when feelings are in the driver’s seat — and reason is left behind.
“I can’t cope!”
“This will never get better.”
“I have to act right now.”
Wise Mind
Wise Mind is where Emotion Mind and Reasonable Mind come together.
It is the quiet, steady voice inside you that says:
“This is hard… and I can handle it.”
“I’m afraid… and I know what needs to be done.”
“I hurt… and I choose to act in line with my values.”
Wise Mind decisions are free from inner conflict. They feel calm, grounded, and true.
They don’t come from urgency — they come from clarity.
How Do You Access Wise Mind?
Finding Wise Mind consistently takes practice. It helps to:
Pause and breathe before reacting
Notice when you’re in Emotion or Reasonable Mind
Ask: What would my Wise Mind say right now?
Practice mindfulness, even for a few moments a day
Over the next week, practice finding your WISE mind when cravings show up or you find yourself staring into the pantry or fridge, looking for answers. How does this change your thoughts and actions?
Change is hard, but time is going to pass regardless. You can choose to start changing your relationship with food today.